Thursday, November 13, 2008

Shot Through the Heart

I had a feeling of this yesterday. One of my extended family members said something to me that made me catch my breath. I just did not expect to be treated or not trusted the way I was and now I need to be 'confrontational' and actually talk about it, because I need to be an adult, something I often forget that I am.

I think what shocked me the most is that this person does not really know me. I know I can be mouthy and joke around but I really love God and therefore really love people and want them to love the Lord and love themselves. I know that I can be sarcastic but I also know not all people can handle that and really try to tune into that. I have been praying for a situation that the Lord has answered in a 'yes' way and now this person wants me to be silent and just let God move. Like I was going to hire a banner that says ' Yeah this happened' and hurt or even more discourage the happiness that is going on. I feel like I need to say to this person 'I am sorry you don't know me and you really hurt me by your words' and then I need to LET IT GO. The Holidays are coming and I need to be OK by then for everyone's sake.

Why can't I just be 14 again and let my mom and dad take care of me, feed me and help me deal? I hope with age comes wisdom because I need it. Thanks for letting me vent!

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