To Infinity and Beyond

I truly thought that my son would outgrow Buzz Lightyear by his 11th birthday but am so glad he didn't. I love this kid and his love for Christ and others and his wit. He is so funny and knows it and yet so wants to figure everything out. I never have cared how things work, just thankful they do, he wants to know how everything works.
He is also so loving and truly thoughtful and now very old but will always be my baby boy! I thank the Lord for him even if he looks just like his father and nothing like me. :)

Go Shorty, It's Your Birthday

I am 36 years old today! Yeah! I just got the best present - an appointment to Mayo Clinic for my pain on MONDAY! How excited am I? So excited to see an end in site. I just hope to have a plan of action at the very least to deal with the pain but would love a solution.

What have I learned this year?

• That God is in control no matter how much I want to be.
• That Love is everywhere, even in people that you are not looking for it in.
• That I am not crazy!!! (well not that crazy)
• My family and friends rock even when I am not intentional in our relationships.
• I am still a work in progress.
• My kids are smarter than I am.
• My hubby is getting hotter and hotter!
• Life is good even in the valleys there is still so much good.

Truth Is

I wonder if I did the right thing last night. I have noticed a kid in my youth group who has chosen a different path. Not like a unique spirit but really a gangsta wanna be, wanting to be cool and throw around useless words and drink underage and such. I told his parents what I saw on Facebook and his mom started crying. I told her I would want to know if my child was showing signs of going down the wrong path. I am unsure if it is right.

The only thing I keep going back to in my head is how I wish someone would have told me my ex was cheating on me. After the divorce many said they knew but during the marriage not a word. There may have been a lot less suffering on both our parts if I was brought to reality and did not live on hope that it may not be true (it was very obvious) or that he would stop. I left after the third affair I knew of.

So if you see something in my kids or me for that matter (not Steve, go to him) please tell me. I may cry or defend but the truth is often needed to be heard.

Breakaway

I had a great discussion with one of my friends about our past. About even though we don't want it to define us it will always make up a part of who we are. We can't forget it but we can learn from it. We have so many people in our lives that don't know what we went through and can never understand why we need to talk about those times. God has given me my Jonathan and David relationship through this friend and I am forever thankful.

So as I was recollecting about the past a new news article was brought to my attention that made me look at my past again. I am still angry about this part of my past and even though I have forgiven and asked for forgiveness and was blessed by God being glorified, I still wonder how to deal with the hurt and pain that this situation has brought. Do we ever get over nightmares that we live through?

I must say I feel safe and secure in my life but still need to process things and it is always good for me to see where I once was and be thankful for where I am now. This is how I know of God's love as He has held me through countless nightmares when I had no strength left. I can leave my past behind but need to look back sometimes to see where I have been to remember how far I have come.

I Sure Could Use a Little Good News Today

There has been a lot of pain and suffering in the lives of people around me lately. A lot of death, financial woes, sickness (me included) and relationship distress. You can't turn on the radio, tv, look at an email without something tragic that has happened and it is hard not to wonder why. But there is Good News!
Christ has risen and loves us and has a purpose for us. I know when you hit rock bottom you can only look up but why not when it is not that bad. Look to Him who holds the world in His hand and rest in His Promises. I am trying to and will pray that you see His goodness all around you.