Pieces of Me

I am so over my pity party. As I surfed the web late last night, I read a blog from a distant friend that led me to a blog of a person I did not know but totally enjoyed the openness and the heart of this person. I soon found out that it was a classmates wife's blog and I have been praying for their many hardships throughout the past few years. It made me realize my life is not as hard as I though it was.

I think the thing that I was most discouraged about is yet another surgery. I am sure my pain is ovarian cyst pain and they may just need to take out the ovary. Oh well, it is a quick recovery one if I need it.

I also realized how precious my kids are as this woman lost a child. I have never lost a piece of me. I feel as though that is what children are. Delivering them sure feels like it, loving them takes all you have sometimes, hoping that they know Love and they are prepared for the world can be so draining and time consuming that you almost cease to exist, it has to be so hard to lose one. I am praying for all those who are not holding the babies they once had, never met, had to give back to the Lord.

Every Rose Has It's Thorn

Pics from vacation

I have had a really good summer and love that it isn't so hot I can't take it or have to be in air conditioning all day. We had a great vacation and I think I am on the downhill of all that is good in life.

On vacation I got this cold. It was over 2 weeks ago. I either never got rid of it or now have a new one. For the past 2 months I have had side pain again and it seems to be affecting me more this past week. This week has been very busy with VBS and work and Steve's birthday and stuff that is fun but somewhat more work than I want. So I am whiny, a bit down, a bit frustrated with pain and sickness and yet realize I have such a GREAT LIFE! I hate being caught in the middle. Limbo, that is my state, that is where I live right now. I am sure sleep, the ending of VBS and maybe the fair on Friday will help.

Thanks for listening - just needed to vent.

Boomin'

I love to play this song and open the windows while pulling into church and have people look at me like I am crazy. It is so fun to see reactions and judgement written all over the faces! I am too old to be a punk but they think it at first.

I have been thinking about how I am finally becoming more comfortable with who I am and more of who I once was. I was fun and outgoing, maybe too sensitive, but loving. I now am getting to be more outgoing again, depends on hormones for the sensitive part but working on the loving or at least walking in someone else's shoes. I try for fun but it is much more reserved, mom-type fun. That's OK, I hope with age comes wisdom so that I can have fun and be wise with it.

I am ready to try something new and can not think what to try. Any suggestions would be great!

I Love a Rainy Night

We need rain - everywhere! I was so happy to hear it this morning. My kids come home today and vacation is officially over but summertime is so great. I get to spend so much more time with the kids and I feel so honored to have a job that allows flexibility.

I had a conversation with a mom yesterday about raising kids that are now adults and as we talked, I have no insight as my kids are still legally my responsibility, I realized by the age she was talking, which was 20, I was married and was a mom. I sometimes mourn the years I missed to find myself but learned so much during that time.

Here is a pic of the bunch I get back today -

Eternal Flame

So we are on vacation. Usually we don't have computer access, dish or phone and this time we have all 3. We have managed to stay a bit disconnected. We started vaca with Steve sick, bad cold, now Gracie and I have it. Lots of downtime to get better though, still lots of fun - Gracie is 3 wheeling right now. It went from 80 degrees on Monday, skiing, swimming, fishing for 14 hours even I went skiing, to 50 degrees today, but indoor fun is great. Went to Duluth yesterday, I was really out of it but enjoyed the tower, the playground and the canal shopping. My kids want to swim. I may let them if they are crazy enough.

All in all I would rather be here than anywhere else. I get to spend time with my hubby, my parents, my kids, God and love life. Might go fishing today but afraid we may hit ice - just kidding. Supposed to be near 80 tomorrow. Having a blast and other than spending time with friends, don't miss a thing!

Summer, Summer, Summertime

This is what I love about summer!

You're Hot then You're Cold

Ever notice the ebb and flow of life. I do. I am either up or down, have a streak of happy or a streak of moody. There are some days I am sure that are just fine but probably don't notice them as much, nothing special just the plain old days of life. I like those days.

I am definitely on an appreciative streak if nothing else. I am so grateful for the relationships in my life. (WARNING - SAPPINESS AHEAD) First, my hubby, I love him more today than yesterday and still think he is so cute. He is such a good dad and friend. I am grateful. My kids, I am so happy they are all home and that we get to have a week at the cabin together and just chill. Hopefully laugh a lot and not fight too much and enjoy life. My mom, dad, and all in laws have been so good in my life. My friends, what can I say about those who challenge me to be my best, who encourage me when I am at my worst and love me when I can't want to be loved. Grateful for all of that! Hope it keeps up!

Great Fourth of July with friends that are really family - love summer - not liking the stone that is not passing fast enough but it will!