This is really what I want in life. Something I will never attain. Control is something I never really would be ready to take fully on. I wish I could sometimes be the puppet master and make things happen, make people love, make people honest, make people understand, make people listen and make people see God.
I have given up the quest of being liked by everybody, the quest of fitting a mold or trying to be something I am not. I know who I am and I definitely know who I AM NOT! I am OK with me it's just how I react to the world around me, to the pain, to the joy, to it all. I need to lay it all down and let God be in control and leave it at that. I am sure that is something I will be working on until heaven but something good to keep in mind.
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