Right now I realize that is what I have been doing. I have been allowing myself to be blind to things to come so that I will not react. I got over being numb and censoring myself but now I need to open my eyes to reality. Don't hear me wrong, I do this every summer. I enjoy the moments and the freedom and the daylight and the warmth. I am sure most of us don't sit around on a hot July night and think about how it will be below zero and we will have boots and mittens laying around the house. My head has not been in the sand but I have purposely blocked a few things out of my sight. They are all becoming clear.
As I glimpse some of the 'stuff' to come, yes, one of those things is school, I know my reaction should be as it has been all summer, that God is in control. I need not rely on myself to make it better or less scary but rest in His arms. I can do that.
I get my baby back tomorrow from camp. She went alone and my sleep went with her. I can't wait until we are all home for the rest of the summer or at least together!
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