I am sure everyone goes in funks. I get there and don't even know I hit it. I think it is due to my job, my changes in life, my moment, but it is mostly that I allow myself to sit in the funk. I am not sure why I ever think this is ok, why is this allowed in my life? I don't allow my kids to live in a funk why are my expectations so different for myself.
I am so thankful for Christ's love, for my hubby and kids, my parents and in-laws, brother and all other family!! I am so thankful for the friends who put up with me when I can not stand myself!! Very thankful! Good place.
Thursday, June 30, 2016
Tuesday, March 15, 2016
Long Time Gone
I feel I must blog for my own sanity today just to get some things out and come to some understanding and compassion for myself. I have had an interesting year with some random health stuff to personal distrust in people. I know that my Jesus has walked me through it all, and will continue to, and my Trust is in Him.
Steve and I have made some major steps in our lives with buying a duplex and feeling more secure in jobs and in our marriage. I often talk with friends and say I have to follow Steve's lead on this when it comes to some decisions with our kids and with our money and I say it like it is such a chore. It is such a blessing to have a man who is following God's call and leading His family. I am not a doormat, I speak my mind but I have learned to submit better, always working on it.
My health is improving. I had a doctor tell me that I needed bariatric surgery in February and I cried for a long time and then decided it was time to do something about my weight. I am down about 10 lbs. Goal for the end of the year is 25 hope to get there and keep being healthy. Long way to go but the changes are really good in my life.
My friendships have suffered. I have closed off most people due to not trusting what I can say, what won't be brought back to me from someone else, if it is even worthy to say, and so on. I was burned a bit last year and have kind of avoided a whole social group altogether. I only allow movies and people at my house with Steve present so I don't say something I may regret or don't want others to know. I am a friend for life that is just the truth but I can no longer be the only one working on the friendship.
The world is a mess. Politics is a joke. Things can be hard. God is in control and that is the peace I cling to. I am so blessed and I am joyful and I love that I can let it all go and let God.
Steve and I have made some major steps in our lives with buying a duplex and feeling more secure in jobs and in our marriage. I often talk with friends and say I have to follow Steve's lead on this when it comes to some decisions with our kids and with our money and I say it like it is such a chore. It is such a blessing to have a man who is following God's call and leading His family. I am not a doormat, I speak my mind but I have learned to submit better, always working on it.
My health is improving. I had a doctor tell me that I needed bariatric surgery in February and I cried for a long time and then decided it was time to do something about my weight. I am down about 10 lbs. Goal for the end of the year is 25 hope to get there and keep being healthy. Long way to go but the changes are really good in my life.
My friendships have suffered. I have closed off most people due to not trusting what I can say, what won't be brought back to me from someone else, if it is even worthy to say, and so on. I was burned a bit last year and have kind of avoided a whole social group altogether. I only allow movies and people at my house with Steve present so I don't say something I may regret or don't want others to know. I am a friend for life that is just the truth but I can no longer be the only one working on the friendship.
The world is a mess. Politics is a joke. Things can be hard. God is in control and that is the peace I cling to. I am so blessed and I am joyful and I love that I can let it all go and let God.
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